Bridgette the Hooker, ALL asians are bottoms and the Village

Ok, so it’s 1:50am here in Toronto, the eve of daylight savings, so I’m gonna gain an hour but I’m still going to make this quick…

On the night where London Orca are hosting their first European Tournament and obviously having a MARVELLOUS kiki I’ve been to a house party and gone to Byzantium in the Village (Church St)… there’s a few thing that I’ve noticed…

So it seems a blonde asian is quite a novelty… let alone a full B cupped chested gaysian in a black cowl neck top… I dunno if the looks I was getting were generally positive but I kind of felt like a fish out of water and it made me realise that North America still is quite conservative compared to their european counter parts.. and how much I kind of miss the flashing lights and singlet dresses and petticoats for men of London… le sigh!…

At the house party I was treated to a delightful and brief conversation that went like this…

‘Hi, what’s your name?’
‘Hi, I’m Ming, nice to meet you’
‘I’m Brad, I like your hair’
‘Thanks, I’m naturally blonde… naturally blonde asians are very rare…’
‘Ooooooh I love asians!’
‘Yeah? that’s good!’
‘Yeah, I love asians because ALL asians are bottoms…’
‘Oh, that’s a rather general statement’
*silence*…
*Cue .gif*

When someone tells you ALL asians are bottoms…

But despite feeling like a little bit of a fish out of water whilst dancing to Jennifer Lopez ft Pitbull’s Dance Again the good news is I made a new friend… a girl I have seen around the block recently a few times… bleached blonde hair, hooker heels and a figure to die for… I shall call her Bridgette until I have further confirmation of her name… well, tonight, on the walk home ,Bridgette was walking in front of me with a black acquaintance and she was wearing leopard print leggings with matching leopard stilettos and a big bomber puffer jacket… I said to Steven

‘I’ve seen her a few times now, I think she’s a lady of night…and her bleached hair, we MUST go to the same hairdresser’
Steven and I picked up the pace to past Bridgette and her companion
‘Oh my GOD! I LOVE your hair!!!’
‘OH MY GOD! I was just saying to my friend here we MUST go to the same hairdresser *insert high pitched asian giggle*’
‘No, I LOVE YOUR HAIR!! hahahahaha!’
‘Oooooh! and I love your shoes!!!!’
Bridgette continued to walk on with her companion and I yelled out to her
‘Oooooooooh! You’re so lovely! BE NICE TO HER! SHE SEEMS LIKE A NICE GIRL!’
her black companion yelled back
‘Ohhh yeah I’m sure I’m gonna be nice, after I pound her!!!’
*OMSF!!!*

SO it seems like although the gays here in Toronto may not get me, at least the local hooker does! WIN!!

x

Advertisements

say something witty/enlightening/funny

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s